Dun know who will be reading my blog cause i din really tell anyone abt it? :) So whatever u read here just keep it here... Thanks :)

Today was a tiring day for me! Was doing overnight duty onboard my ship yesterday so din manage to sleep much. Was damn tired when i was making my way back to sembawang, thought i was going home right !! :) but guess again... went to the NDU base for this damage control team test which we fail in thy end so shall not talk much abt it cause that wasnt the reason why i decided to blog... haha

Went back home after all the test and training, chiong straight to my laptop and on my msn, cause i know she will be online! And guess what she is really online... So i was seriously thinking if i should start contacting her, finally i pick up my courage and msn her, and to my surprise she replied me!! :) I was like WeeEeee... so decided to ask her out soon to chit chat dinner etc etc. But she rejected me i wasnt really very sad cause somehow i knew that was coming but even if there's a 0.00000000001% chance she will say "yes" i will put my pride manhood "skin" etc etc all aside and just pray that she will say yes... But that's not the most hurting thing she said to me... she said "i dun wish to have dinner alone with you"... I seriously understand why she said that to me... i dun blame her! i blame myself my job and my stupid character!!!

Some pple might read this blog and laugh at my english but i dun care!!! just wan a place to say out what i really feel !!! Anyway i din force u to read, so please F#%K OFF okay...

Some pple might also think why am i so stupid. Which i think i am! I dun really care, i just know love is never fair if u ever wan a fair love u will just be single for the rest of your life and im serious!! I dun wan to regret one day, i know she hurt me very deep, behind my back did many things which a girlfriend should not do but i dun care all i know is i love her and i wan her back... Which is impossible now... HA HA HA why must fate do this to me, i was happily in love with her and just need just a min to take everything away from me and make my world so dark!! WHY WHY WHY !!!! what have i done wrong in the past.... But mark my word! i will not give up without trying... I will not lose the girl i love most to that guy!! I know my friends out there are very worry abt me. This time i'll set myself a limit. Sometimes we just got to let them go cause u never know leaving you will be a better choice for him/her, so if i know is time to let her go i will let it go. Just pray that the next person u get will treat u better, if he cant treat u better at least give u more happiness den me!!!

So to those who are reading this blog, dun wait till it's lost forever den u start to treasure it!

To my friends out there, dun worry abt me! im okay just abit emo thats all.
To my buddy I'll rather YOU go and concentrate on my studies. Please i know u care alot abt me but im worry more abt your studies okay !! buddy for life ;)